Monday, March 21, 2011

The not-so-proactive pregnancy pill--Provera!

Well, after the talk I had with the nurse today, it looks like I will be doing another two cycles of Provera.  They are "hoping" that the next two cycles of Provera will program my body to start periods on its own and become "regular".  Birth control never regulated me, so I have suspicions about this medicine.  It agitates me that instead of having me come back into the office, the doctor ordered two more cycles of Provera before he'll see me again.  That's another three more months before I can find anything new out about my problem.  Last time I had talked to him he said he was going to put me on the meds and then have me come back in for an ultrasound.  At least the ultrasound would be proactive in achieving pregnancy.  I just don't see this medicine as proactive. 

So, I'm stuck another three months with slim chances of getting pregnant.  GREAT!  That's EXACTLY what I was wanting to hear from the doctor....NOT! 

I called my mom today to tell her what the doctor said and before I knew it I was a blabbering ball bag.  I just cried and cried and cried to my mom (I think I had her crying in the process too).  I hate who I was on Provera.  That medicine turned me into the wife I couldn't recognize.  I was incredibly hormonal.  I went from one emotion to the next before I even realized I didn't feel the same as I had the minute before.  It was ridiculous.  I felt sorry for Luke, but I couldn't help it.  I cried to my mom about how angry it made me that I was having to put Luke through all this too.  I mean, I'm the wife.  I'm supposed to be able to bear children.  It's supposed to be something natural and easy to do.  Apparently that's not the case for me.  As I explained to my mom earlier, I've always had to work hard for the things I wanted to achieve in life.  Why does this have to be one of the things that I have to work hard for?  It's supposed to come naturally.  I shouldn't have to seek help from a doctor in order to get pregnant, but I am.

This is my life now

The life of a young married woman who has trouble conceiving a child. 


  1. I'll be praying that this will work. I'm so sorry. I don't know what to write. I can't imagine how hard that would be :(

    All I know is that God will have His will in this situation. I remember how scared I was to have a baby after our son died from birth defects. I was terrified because the doctor said we'd have a 10% chance of all our kids having defects. We had three healthy children after Zeke died. So, sometimes doctors are wrong.

    You would have the most beautiful babies. Keep trying. I'm praying for you every day.

  2. You're way more than just that. You are a child of God, beautiful and perfect, just the way you are.

  3. I agree with both of the other ladies. You're a fantastic person and God will see you through this. This may sound crazy girl but my cousin tried for 10 years. She tried everything. One day my aunt read an article about when your back is not aligned properly it can actually stop you from concieving. So my cousin went to the chiropractor and got aligned and now has three beautiful children. Just a thought. Don't know if you have tried that route yet or not. Sounds like you are in the same situation she was. I'll be praying for you girl.

  4. I'm so sorry you are having problems getting pregnant. You WILL be a great mom. You're a very loving person and God will take care of you. Things may not work out the way you plan, but His plan will be worth waiting for. You are in my prayers.


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