Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Olivia's tragedy--part two
Just in case you're just now tuning in, please read Olivia's tragedy from yesterday so that this post makes sense to you.
....So there she was, standing in her kitchen, eyes wide open and mouth dropped to the floor in utter shock. "How could she do that," thought Olivia. "WHY would she do that?!?!?" To Olivia's surprise, that "sweet little lady" that she took care of that could do no wrong was no longer as sweet as she appeared.
Olivia had opened the Styrofoam container, and much to her surprise, the sweet and sour chicken that had been kindly given to her for lunch was no longer there. Heck, there was barely anything there....well, with the exception of the two 2 week old pieces of chicken strips (with NO sauce of any sort)--one of which was HALF EATEN--and a dollop of mashed potatoes that were so hard that they cracked when poked with a fork. Yes, that's right folks...Olivia's client stole her lunch AND got away with it--all while she was in the very next room.
Normally Olivia could laugh such a situation off and move on, but for some reason, that day was different. All she thought of the rest of the day was how her client had been deceitful and literally went behind her back. I guess that's the price I pay--*ahem* I mean OLIVIA PAYS--for leaving a *insert random number for HIPPA's sake* 94 year old woman unattended for a few moments.....
Grrr....CHILDREN!
....So there she was, standing in her kitchen, eyes wide open and mouth dropped to the floor in utter shock. "How could she do that," thought Olivia. "WHY would she do that?!?!?" To Olivia's surprise, that "sweet little lady" that she took care of that could do no wrong was no longer as sweet as she appeared.
Olivia had opened the Styrofoam container, and much to her surprise, the sweet and sour chicken that had been kindly given to her for lunch was no longer there. Heck, there was barely anything there....well, with the exception of the two 2 week old pieces of chicken strips (with NO sauce of any sort)--one of which was HALF EATEN--and a dollop of mashed potatoes that were so hard that they cracked when poked with a fork. Yes, that's right folks...Olivia's client stole her lunch AND got away with it--all while she was in the very next room.
Normally Olivia could laugh such a situation off and move on, but for some reason, that day was different. All she thought of the rest of the day was how her client had been deceitful and literally went behind her back. I guess that's the price I pay--*ahem* I mean OLIVIA PAYS--for leaving a *insert random number for HIPPA's sake* 94 year old woman unattended for a few moments.....
Grrr....CHILDREN!
Monday, August 29, 2011
Olivia's tragedy....
Once upon a time there was a girl named...*insert random name*...Olivia. Olivia worked very hard at her job day after day. You see, Olivia took care of people...people who could no longer take care of themselves. Well, one day Olivia was given a gift, and the lady she worked for did the unthinkable!
Olivia's client received meals on wheels every day so that she no longer had to worry about cooking for herself. Every day Olivia would watch as her client received food and wished that just one day meals on wheels might have an extra meal for her (so she didn't have to watch her client eat alone, of course!) One day, after months of awkwardly staring at her client eat her food alone, Olivia's wish came true.
The doorbell rang. It was meals on wheels. How exciting thought Olivia's client...lunch had arrived AND it was sweet and sour chicken day, too! Much to Olivia's surprise, the lady bringing the meals carried in one extra meal and asked her if she would like it...for FREE! With much anticipation, I mean heck--it was sweet and sour chicken day! Olivia and her client enthusiastically thanked the meals on wheels lady for their food, and immediately went to the cabinet to open their meals! They awed over how scrumptious the chicken looked with its sweetness and sourness all over it! Olivia was excited to eat the free meal, but before she could indulge herself in its delectable goodness, her phone rang.
Olivia politely excused herself from the kitchen so that she could answer the phone. As she carried on a conversation with the person on the phone, she noticed that her client kept peaking around the corner as is she were trying to see if she was going to get caught doing something. Of course, Olivia didn't think anything of her clients strange behavior. A few minutes passed and Olivia returned to the kitchen. She noticed that her meal was now wrapped in a different bag and tied in a walmart bag. She found this very strange, but did not ask any questions. Her client then told her that she was going to eat her food later that day and that she can go home because she no longer needed her to stay the remainder of the day.
Olivia leaped for joy inside because it meant that she could go home AND eat the FREE sweet and sour chicken! So, she quickly grabbed the newly wrapped food and made her way home. She called her husband to tell him of her excitement in receiving her wish. She finally arrived home and rushed into her kitchen. She untied the plastic bag and opened the Styrofoam container in which was supposed to contain the sweet and sour chicken so kindly given to her, but much to her surprise, the container that she was sooooo looking forward to was no longer...
***pause for dramatic effect**
******You'll have to come back tomorrow to hear the remainder of Olivia's tragedy******
Olivia's client received meals on wheels every day so that she no longer had to worry about cooking for herself. Every day Olivia would watch as her client received food and wished that just one day meals on wheels might have an extra meal for her (so she didn't have to watch her client eat alone, of course!) One day, after months of awkwardly staring at her client eat her food alone, Olivia's wish came true.
The doorbell rang. It was meals on wheels. How exciting thought Olivia's client...lunch had arrived AND it was sweet and sour chicken day, too! Much to Olivia's surprise, the lady bringing the meals carried in one extra meal and asked her if she would like it...for FREE! With much anticipation, I mean heck--it was sweet and sour chicken day! Olivia and her client enthusiastically thanked the meals on wheels lady for their food, and immediately went to the cabinet to open their meals! They awed over how scrumptious the chicken looked with its sweetness and sourness all over it! Olivia was excited to eat the free meal, but before she could indulge herself in its delectable goodness, her phone rang.
Olivia politely excused herself from the kitchen so that she could answer the phone. As she carried on a conversation with the person on the phone, she noticed that her client kept peaking around the corner as is she were trying to see if she was going to get caught doing something. Of course, Olivia didn't think anything of her clients strange behavior. A few minutes passed and Olivia returned to the kitchen. She noticed that her meal was now wrapped in a different bag and tied in a walmart bag. She found this very strange, but did not ask any questions. Her client then told her that she was going to eat her food later that day and that she can go home because she no longer needed her to stay the remainder of the day.
Olivia leaped for joy inside because it meant that she could go home AND eat the FREE sweet and sour chicken! So, she quickly grabbed the newly wrapped food and made her way home. She called her husband to tell him of her excitement in receiving her wish. She finally arrived home and rushed into her kitchen. She untied the plastic bag and opened the Styrofoam container in which was supposed to contain the sweet and sour chicken so kindly given to her, but much to her surprise, the container that she was sooooo looking forward to was no longer...
***pause for dramatic effect**
******You'll have to come back tomorrow to hear the remainder of Olivia's tragedy******
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
So excited.
Hello my lovely blog readers,
I just realized that my client has WiFi at her house, and it's not password protected!!! So, I am finally able to use the Internet! The Internet at our house hasn't been working for a few months (which is part of the reason for the lack of blogs!). So, since I've been MIA for two weeks, I guess I'll update you all.
I have recently gone from working 8 hours a week up to 32 hours. BIG help! The only thing I would change is the hours that I work. I'm working 10-Noon (Mon-Thurs) with one client and then I travel 30 minutes away and work 2-8pm with my new client (Mon-Wed, Fri). It's a strange feeling not getting to see my husband until almost 9 at night, especially since he leaves at 6:30 am for work!
We're getting a new Internet provider. Today, actually. I finally had enough of AT&T and their Internet, so we're switching to Mediacom. Hopefully we'll be able to have better Internet access now that it will run through a cable line. Consistent internet access = more blog posts! Hooray!
I begin my 18th year of school this Thursday (yes, I'm counting Kindergarten). I have committed myself to an accelerated program for the next 18 months in order to finish my Bachelors. I'm nervous about cramming a semester long class into 5 weeks, but I'm sure I'll live! The only problem with the program is that I can NOT miss one night of class! At least I only attend class once a week from 6-10 pm!
Luke and I are taking a sabbatical of sorts from ministry for the next month (AKA: VACATION!!!). With the kind of year we've had, we're in desperate need of a break for a bit and not have to worry about the ins and outs of what's going on at the church. AND, the best part of this break is that it surrounds my birthday our 2nd wedding anniversary. Not that we're going to go anywhere exotic or anything, but it will be nice not having obligations during those dates.
Well, I better get off here and type up my homework that's due for the first day of class on Thursday (that's the original reason I even have my laptop here tonight!). I hope all of you are doing well, and I'll try to catch up on commenting on your blogs at some point tonight!
Blessings,
Alicia Marie
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Healing...
I'm on a journey to healing. Healing of my heart, my my mind, and my soul. This fertility journey has stolen many aspects of my life, including happiness, and I'm BEYOND ready to take it back! I'm beginning a book called Hannah's Hope.
Last weekend when Luke and I went on our "date," we stopped by the Christian bookstore on the south side of town. I immediately went to the parenting section to seek out infertility books (ironic, huh?). I wanted a Christian perspective on our situation, but to my surprise, they did not have even one book about infertility. They had TONS of books on parenting, and adoption too, but NONE on infertility. My heart ached for a few minutes because I had hoped to find a book. I found the manager of the store and asked him if they carried any books on infertility. He looked it up in the system, and once again they didn't have anything. They've never ordered infertility books because of the overwhelming need for adoption and parenting books. He could see the disappointment in my face due to not having even a single book, so the kind man asked me to follow him to the back. He went straight to a computer, and he started looking something up. He searched out for christian infertility books that he might be able to have shipped to his store. As we were going down the list, the "Hannah's Hope" book popped out. I read the following description, "Hannah’s Hope offers insightful and heartfelt encouragement for couples dealing with infertility, miscarriage or failed adoption. Building on the story of Hannah (First Samuel, chapter 1), Jennifer Saake interweaves her personal experiences with advice gleaned from over ten years of providing aid to grieving families through the support network she co-founded with husband Rick, Hannah’s Prayer Ministries. While remaining true to the very real and anguishing emotions of longing for a child, Jenni continually directs her readers back to the comfort and strength of a compassionate God. Each chapter concludes with a special “Burden Bearers” section offering practical suggestions for pastors, family members and friends." When I read the description, I felt I should order it. So, I did!
I received a call from the bookstore Thursday afternoon, and by Friday afternoon the book was in my hands! I've only just begun reading it, but I hope and pray that this book will help bring me peace and the healing I've been needing. I can't wait to share with you what the Lord has done in my life through this book.
Last weekend when Luke and I went on our "date," we stopped by the Christian bookstore on the south side of town. I immediately went to the parenting section to seek out infertility books (ironic, huh?). I wanted a Christian perspective on our situation, but to my surprise, they did not have even one book about infertility. They had TONS of books on parenting, and adoption too, but NONE on infertility. My heart ached for a few minutes because I had hoped to find a book. I found the manager of the store and asked him if they carried any books on infertility. He looked it up in the system, and once again they didn't have anything. They've never ordered infertility books because of the overwhelming need for adoption and parenting books. He could see the disappointment in my face due to not having even a single book, so the kind man asked me to follow him to the back. He went straight to a computer, and he started looking something up. He searched out for christian infertility books that he might be able to have shipped to his store. As we were going down the list, the "Hannah's Hope" book popped out. I read the following description, "Hannah’s Hope offers insightful and heartfelt encouragement for couples dealing with infertility, miscarriage or failed adoption. Building on the story of Hannah (First Samuel, chapter 1), Jennifer Saake interweaves her personal experiences with advice gleaned from over ten years of providing aid to grieving families through the support network she co-founded with husband Rick, Hannah’s Prayer Ministries. While remaining true to the very real and anguishing emotions of longing for a child, Jenni continually directs her readers back to the comfort and strength of a compassionate God. Each chapter concludes with a special “Burden Bearers” section offering practical suggestions for pastors, family members and friends." When I read the description, I felt I should order it. So, I did!
I received a call from the bookstore Thursday afternoon, and by Friday afternoon the book was in my hands! I've only just begun reading it, but I hope and pray that this book will help bring me peace and the healing I've been needing. I can't wait to share with you what the Lord has done in my life through this book.
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Thankful Thursday
As down as I have been lately, I am forcing myself to realize the good things in my life. I NEED to do this. If not for my sake then for your reading sake. I know the last few posts have been downers, and for that I'm sorry. I am in search of lighthearted reading material for you all. I promise!
So, here's what I'm thankful for...
So, here's what I'm thankful for...
- Waking up this morning (at least I hope I wake up today (Thursday)--I'm writing this from the future--well...Monday that is, so I guess as you're reading this it would be your past????)--Even the simplest of things can be taken for granted.
- Times when I really feel that my prayers are reaching Heaven--Even if my prayers are not answered, at least I'm reassured that they are being heard!
- Songs with lyrics that seem to resonate with my heart--"No tears in Heaven, no sorrows given, all will be glory in that land; There'll be no sadness, all will be gladness, when we shall join that happy band. No tears, no tears, no tears up there, sorrow and pain will all have flown; No tears, no tears, no tears up there, no tears in Heaven will be known."
- Scriptures that come from my Father to comfort me in my time of need. "Jeremiah 31:13--I will turn their mourning into gladness. I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow." --There are so many more, but for lack of time, I chose this one to share.
I am so incredibly blessed, and sometimes I fail to acknowledge my blessings. Despite situations in life, as long as I have breath in my lungs, I am blessed.
Friday, August 5, 2011
It's a date!
I can't tell you how long it has been since Luke and I have been on a "date." I mean, we've gone out to eat. We've gone to a movie, but we've not called it a "date" in a very long time. I guess that's something that comes a long with marriage. It's not necessarily a bad thing because we do go out and do things, but I guess this is the girly side of me getting excited at the word "date." Almost as if I'm being taken back to the days before marriage (almost two years ago). Kind of exciting, even though I know we're just going out to eat and to see a movie or a play.
Our two year wedding anniversary, our three years of being together, and my 22 birthday are all next month and all of which happen within a week of one another. I start school again in two weeks and will be going full time for a year and a half straight. No Summer break. We weren't sure whether we would be able to get away and do anything for our anniversary because we still do not know my new work schedule, so we're getting out today--just in case.
He's taking off work at noon (which is in three minutes--can you tell I'm excited to get out of this house?!?!?) I'm not really sure what the day holds, but at least I get to spend time with him. I need to get out and find something else for my mind to concentrate on.
Hopefully tomorrow everything will be better! :)
Have a great weekend!
Our two year wedding anniversary, our three years of being together, and my 22 birthday are all next month and all of which happen within a week of one another. I start school again in two weeks and will be going full time for a year and a half straight. No Summer break. We weren't sure whether we would be able to get away and do anything for our anniversary because we still do not know my new work schedule, so we're getting out today--just in case.
He's taking off work at noon (which is in three minutes--can you tell I'm excited to get out of this house?!?!?) I'm not really sure what the day holds, but at least I get to spend time with him. I need to get out and find something else for my mind to concentrate on.
Hopefully tomorrow everything will be better! :)
Have a great weekend!
Monday, August 1, 2011
My plea...
Lately I've really been struggling. A lot. Friday we received our newest Netflix movie in the mail, and I was so excited to have a new movie to watch because our internet hasn't allowed us to get our Netflix fix (say that 10 times fast) via the Wii. Apparently a few months back, I requested we receive the movie Like Dandelion Dust, and it came in the mail at a REALLY bad time. I live in an emotional state as it it (Hey! I'm a girl!), and I definitely shouldn't have watched that movie when I did.
After crying throughout the entire movie (I told you I'm emotional), I sat on the couch processing every emotion I was feeling. It wasn't long before I was curled up on one side of the couch pouring my heart out with tears. Poor Luke, I feel that I put him in certain circumstances at times where he has no idea how to react to me. With every pat on the back he gave me and every kind word he tried to say, my heart sank a little farther into my chest. Of course, no kind word or gesture was going to console me at that point. I knew that if I didn't get a hold of my emotions soon, it would be worse on me in the long run. So, as I often do when I'm sad, I grabbed the keys to my car and set out for a drive. Yes, I know driving alone on a Friday night at 11:00pm is not wise, but I knew I needed to get away for a while.
I drove around my neighborhood for a while before I decided to drive the main streets that surround the town. As I drove around town, I began to cry out to God. I said, "God, I don't understand. This isn't fair! What did I do that was so wrong that I can't be a mother?!?!?" Basically, I began to plead with the Lord. I cried my heart out to Him. "Lord, PLEASE help me. PLEASE! I can't live like this anymore. I'm tired of crying myself to sleep. I'm tired of having breakdowns when I see undeserving parents who treat their little blessings like they're not good enough for love! I'M TIRED OF CRYING MY HEART OUT AND NOTHING HAPPENING!"
After pleading with the Lord, the coolest thing happened. As soon as I poured my heart out (I'm sure I looked looney driving around crying and talking out loud with no one else in the car), I finally felt that my prayers had reached Heaven. The song Better Than A Hallelujah came on the radio. The lyrics to the beginning of the song are, "God loves a lullaby in a mothers tears in the dead of night, better than a hallelujah sometimes. God loves a drunkards cry, a soldiers plea not to let him die. Better than a hallelujah sometimes. We pour out our miseries, God just hears a melody. Beautiful, the mess we are. The honest cries of breaking hearts are better than a hallelujah sometimes."
It was at that moment I knew everything was okay. It was okay to cry my heart out to God. He heard my prayers, my cries, and my pleas. I have always felt that crying was a way of releasing inward pain, but at the same time hated to bring such deep sorrow and pain to the Lord. I never want to 'complain' to the Lord about how unfair I felt I had been treated, but this time I seemed to have gotten an answer in response. He hears my cries, as long as I bring my pain and sorrows before Him, everything will be okay. He just longs to hear from us, no matter how we feel.
**If you haven't ever heard of the movie/song I posted inside this blog, I recommend that you take a moment and click on the links, and give them a listen!**
After crying throughout the entire movie (I told you I'm emotional), I sat on the couch processing every emotion I was feeling. It wasn't long before I was curled up on one side of the couch pouring my heart out with tears. Poor Luke, I feel that I put him in certain circumstances at times where he has no idea how to react to me. With every pat on the back he gave me and every kind word he tried to say, my heart sank a little farther into my chest. Of course, no kind word or gesture was going to console me at that point. I knew that if I didn't get a hold of my emotions soon, it would be worse on me in the long run. So, as I often do when I'm sad, I grabbed the keys to my car and set out for a drive. Yes, I know driving alone on a Friday night at 11:00pm is not wise, but I knew I needed to get away for a while.
I drove around my neighborhood for a while before I decided to drive the main streets that surround the town. As I drove around town, I began to cry out to God. I said, "God, I don't understand. This isn't fair! What did I do that was so wrong that I can't be a mother?!?!?" Basically, I began to plead with the Lord. I cried my heart out to Him. "Lord, PLEASE help me. PLEASE! I can't live like this anymore. I'm tired of crying myself to sleep. I'm tired of having breakdowns when I see undeserving parents who treat their little blessings like they're not good enough for love! I'M TIRED OF CRYING MY HEART OUT AND NOTHING HAPPENING!"
After pleading with the Lord, the coolest thing happened. As soon as I poured my heart out (I'm sure I looked looney driving around crying and talking out loud with no one else in the car), I finally felt that my prayers had reached Heaven. The song Better Than A Hallelujah came on the radio. The lyrics to the beginning of the song are, "God loves a lullaby in a mothers tears in the dead of night, better than a hallelujah sometimes. God loves a drunkards cry, a soldiers plea not to let him die. Better than a hallelujah sometimes. We pour out our miseries, God just hears a melody. Beautiful, the mess we are. The honest cries of breaking hearts are better than a hallelujah sometimes."
It was at that moment I knew everything was okay. It was okay to cry my heart out to God. He heard my prayers, my cries, and my pleas. I have always felt that crying was a way of releasing inward pain, but at the same time hated to bring such deep sorrow and pain to the Lord. I never want to 'complain' to the Lord about how unfair I felt I had been treated, but this time I seemed to have gotten an answer in response. He hears my cries, as long as I bring my pain and sorrows before Him, everything will be okay. He just longs to hear from us, no matter how we feel.
**If you haven't ever heard of the movie/song I posted inside this blog, I recommend that you take a moment and click on the links, and give them a listen!**
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